Green Eyes
by Immortalmint
Summary: Hojo reflecting on the loss of Lucrecia. Some swearing at the end. There's a tad bit of implied sex, but no description of it. It's not nearly as dirty as it sounds, but I've rated it R just in case. This is the first fan fic I'm posting. Be nice and R


Green Eyes

"Put this on," he handed her a lab coat. It looked faded and worn.   
"This old thing? Are you sure you don't want anything more… interesting?" she said in a sultry voice and gave him a seductive smile.   
"I'm sure."   
"So how do you like it? Do you like to play around a little first? Or do you want to get down to business?" She moved her hands down the sides of her body, accenting her curves.   
"Just walk over to the bed. Gracefully, if you're capable of that. Take the coat off and set it to the side. Smile, subtly. Start taking off the rest. Let me lead. Pretend you're enjoying it, but for Gods sake, do it subtly! Whisper 'I love you' or other such things, but say little else. Go it?"   
"Sure, sugar." She winked at him.   
"Don't call me that."   
"What do you want me to call you?"   
He thought for a moment. She had had other names for him… Her favorite was Hojo-jojo. He hated it at first, but she laughed every time she said it, and she was so beautiful when she laughed… She'd smile at him and call him silly names for her own amusement. She insisted Js made people smile. He didn't think letters could do such things, but she claimed it made the corners of a person's mouth turn up just enough…   
No… he didn't want the whore calling him that. "Don't call me anything."   
"Whatever. Anything else?"   
"No. Just get started."   
She walked over to the bed, seductively. Too Seductively. She slowly moved her shoulders from side to side, letting the lab coat fall off her shoulders and onto the floor.   
"No. You set the coat over there!"   
"Fine!" She picked up the coat and draped it over the chair to the side of the bed. "…too damn anal…" she mumbled. She resumed approaching the bed, swaying her hips as she walked. She sat down and turned towards him, smiled too wide, and batted her eyes just enough to be slightly repulsive. She started unbuttoning her shirt.   
He unbuttoned his own. Soon they were both undressed and lying on the mattress. He moved his hand to stroke the side of her face. Her hair was the right shade of brown. Her face shape a near match. But the lips were too big. The eyes were hazel. He wished the eyes were green, like her eyes were… 

  
He stared at the ceiling. She had exaggerated too much. They always exaggerated…   
He had tried to block it out and imagine her. The way she moved, the way she sounded, the way her trembling lips whispered "I love you…" into the night. No one could mimic her subtlety. He supposed you had to be sincere for something like that…   
"Lucrecia…"   
Over the years he had tried to forget. He was responsible for his loneliness. He was responsible for what happened…   
No… that wasn't true. There was that Turk. He interfered. He had convinced her the project was evil. But more than that… he had tried to take Lucrecia away. Damned Turk. Heh… Vincent was certainly damned now…. He had seen to that, personally.   
But Lucrecia… Things would have worked out different if she were willing. Jenova would have kept her alive if she had supported the project. She would have lived to see her son. She would have lived… "And she would have still loved me…" Hojo thought.   
The project was all-important. There were risks. He had known this. But the payoff… She would have finally received the promotion she deserved, and the funding. She would have been able to call the shots on her own projects. She could have had a real project, fully staffed. No more having her ideas and research cut short by lack of funding, no more getting assigned to someone else's team.   
And he… he got his payoff. Head of the science department, funding that would make Palmer's head spin, competent staff, resources, his own personal lab, and a president willing to turn a blind eye to some of his… questionable… research.   
And he had… his specimen… That boy tormented him with those eyes. They glowed unnaturally with Mako, but they were still green… still her eyes…   
Was the boy worth it? Despite the phenomenal initial results, the specimen was… a disappointment. The specimen did not lack physical strength, but he experienced cognitive difficulties that could jeopardize his future in the company, and Hojo's future if he should fail. But there was something more nagging at Hojo's mind. Was Sephiroth, was all of this, really worth the loss of… her?   
_Of course. You have everything you've ever wanted. You must give him time. My son will not disappoint you._   
"Stay out of my head. We agreed this was MY time!"   
_I only wish to reassure you… And to remind you… Be kind to Sephiroth, for he is your son too._   
"Don't remind me… And get out of my head. I don't need the company right now."   
He swore he could hear Jenova laughing inside his head. _…but I believe you have company…_   
"My personal life is not your concern. The project will be taken care of. So get the hell out of my head."   
_As you wish… You humans… such simple, lustful creatures…_ Her laugh faded out.   
"What were you saying?" The whore lying next to him questioned as she blinked her sleepy eyes.   
"Nothing of any significance. Go back to sleep. Or leave."   
"You not up for another round?"   
His glare told her that was the wrong question to ask.   
She decided leaving would be best. She got up, put on her clothes, and collected her things. Her eyes fell on a small box on his desk. It probably held a ring. She wondered whom this man would buy a ring for. She doubted he'd have anyone to buy a ring for. She opened the box and took out the ring.   
"Who's this for?" She held up the ring, It was gold with three small diamonds in it. She moved the ring to her finger, ready to try it on.   
"Get your filthy hands off of that!" His possessive eyes glared at her sharply as he lunged at her, reaching for the ring in her hand.   
She quickly put the ring back in the box. "I wasn't going to steal it! I just wanted to try it on!"   
"OUT!!!! Get out, you fucking whore!!!"   
"Give me the rest of my fucking money and I'll leave!"   
He grabbed his wallet, practically ripped the money out of it, and threw a wad of gil at her feet. He continued to glare at her as she took the money from the floor and stormed to the door.   
"Fucking crazy bastard. I don't get paid to be insulted…" she mumbled as she left his apartment. 

  
Hojo took out the ring and wiped it off with a handkerchief.   
"Lucrecia…" he whispered. He placed her engagement ring back into its box.   
"I feel dirty…" Hojo stated as he walked over to the bathroom and turned on the shower. 


End file.
